Being a teacher is very difficult today. And being a good teacher is even harder. Teachers get a lot of flak from people based on the amount of vacation they get, the idea that they’re just glorified babysitters, or the fact that they have an awesome pension and benefits program. What people fail to recognize when they say these things is that teaching is a job that carries a lot of weight and responsibility. Not only are these people responsible for educating and shaping the minds of the next generation (i.e. the one that will choose our ‘retirement’ homes) but they’re also tasked with doing so in the face of all kinds of external factors they themselves cannot control. Do their students have mental issues (diagnosed or otherwise) that might require special care? Do their kids come from rough backgrounds or hostile home environments, à la The Breakfast Club’s John Bender? Are they doing enough to cater to each individual student? Are they keeping the kids engaged? Are they really teaching them anything useful? Are they preparing them for their future? The list goes on and on. Like I said, it’s difficult to be a good teacher. It’s also tragically easy to be a bad teacher. The funny thing is that, much like Captain Jack Sparrow’s genius often looks like madness, being a good teacher and being a very bad teacher, more often than not, threaten to coincide.
Good or bad, teacher, student or parent, here are a few examples on the teacher quality spectrum that everyone will
1. “Calm Down, Mr. Johnson, You’re Being Very Un-Dude!”
Seriously though, I’d go ape if someone stole my Dude too!
2. “This Is Absolutely UnbeLEAFable!
Honestly, what a rubBUSH substitute! I may have to BRANCH out, and choose another class. Maybe something in the STEM fields…okay, I’m done.
3. The Dark Side Of HDMI
A teacher not realizing that everything they do is projected onto the screen is like the most horrible extension of the “how do I full-screen this” problem they all seem to have!
4. Is Your Name Mr. Umbrella, ‘Cause You Shady!
Fed up with overly demanding students, one teacher decided to use their creative writing degree for evil!
5. TO/DR (Too Old, Didn’t Read)
This is what Murtaugh would have been like if Lethal Weapon was a buddy teacher movie!
6. Where Will You Be When The Drugs Kick In?
I can only hope this dude uses that bird as some kind of Mr. Hat-esque prop while teaching. Mr. Robin…Dr. Dodger…SENOR SWALLOW!
7. Breaking GaGa
He may not know science, but by God, he knows catchy pop music!
8. Chemistry Department Gets Into The Christmas “Spirit!”
“That’s right, every last one…vodka!”
9. “Step 1: Don’t Use These Fonts!”
This is about as far as you can go without actually writing the essays yourself!
10. For When Your Hips Just Can’t Lie!
But honestly, this little blurb makes me quite curious to know what happened that prompted it to be put in a handbook for hopeful teachers!
11. I Don’t Know The Answer, But I Sure Like Thinking About It!
And we all thought we’d never use math in our real lives! Shame on us.
12. Art Teachers Can Be Punny Too!
I would expect this from the English department, but not from you!
13. When You Find That ONE Outfit That Works…
…or possibly just give up on life and wear the same clothes for four decades!
14. “Well, One Us Is Going To Have To Go Home And Change!”
This is only slightly less embarrassing than referring to your teacher as ‘Mom’ or ‘Dad!’
15. Asking The Real Questions!
Not the best way to look edgy and tough!
16. In The Words Of DJ Khaled, You Played Yourself!
The red pen makes it so much more biting!
17. “For The Love Of God, Larry!”
I wonder if ol’ Kooshball is up to his old tricks!
18. Plot Twist: Entrepreneurship Class
The pay must REALLY be bad if teachers have to resort to this!
19. OR He Just Wanted A Reason To Wear His Scooby Doo Costume!
Either way, I respect this man!